Gloating Voter
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I’m stockpiling for harder times
I'm panicking and hoarding
But I won’t vote for Labour 'cos
I don’t like Jeremy Corbyn

Of course I’d like to see more help
for those who face adversity
Of course folk shouldn’t have to pay
to go to university

And rent controls would be so good -
the costs that they’re absorbing
But I’ll not vote for Labour 'cos
I don’t like Jeremy Corbyn

He’s hung out with some dodgy sorts -
the type a good guy hates
So I’ll ignore the tyrants who
that Johnson counts as mates

That Jezza has a silly beard
and seems a little boring
So I won’t vote for Labour 'cos
I don’t like Jeremy Corbyn

He lives in bloody Islington
which means he’s an elite
(Although that borough’s home to some
of Britain’s poorest streets)

Let policies take second place
to personal performing
I like the right-wing clown much more
than I like Jeremy Corbyn

So stuff your free prescriptions
as I’ll gladly keep on paying
Quit moaning about food banks
cos I’m happy that they’re staying

And bollocks to the planet,
climate change and global warming
I won’t be voting Labour 'cos
I don’t like Jeremy Corbyn

Let's keep the railways private
and let's keep our wages low
And let our welfare state decline
and unemployment grow

And when they lay me down to rest
the news will be reporting
I died while on a waiting list
still hating Jeremy Corbyn