First You Let The Cat Out
Add to My Calendar

A satirical piece for cat-loving Leonard Cohen fans ...

They sentenced her to living with the humans
She's going to try to rule them from within
She's purring now, she's purring then she'll doom them
- First you let the cat out, then you let her in

She's guided by an instinct to go hunting
She's guided by an urge to come back in
She's guided by the beauty of her species
- First you let the cat out, then you let her in

She'd like to curl up here beside you, human
And shed her fur and scent upon your clothes
But you see those claws she's drawing sharp and looming
I told you, I told you, told you, she's one of those

Ah you loved her as a pet but now you're worried she'll take over
You could kick her out, but you don't have the discipline
How many nights she stalked that useless Rover
- First you take the cat out, then you take her in

She don't like your cheap dry cat food, mister
And she don't like those vets that want her thin
She won't be neutered like happened to her sister
- First you take the cat out, then you take her in

She'd like to curl up here beside you, human
And shed her fur and scent upon your clothes
But you see those claws she's drawing sharp and looming
I told you, I told you, told you, she's one of those

She never thanks you for the gourmet supper
She leaves it and goes rummaging through the bin
Then drags the bag in while you have a cuppa
- First you take the cat out, then you take her in

Ah remember her, the screeching night-time music
Remember her, she brought a dead mouse in
And yesterday, she brought in one just wounded
- First you take the cat out, then you take her in